Dear Friends,
Wow.
Finishing up a wild November. It seems like time has flown by and I’m not sure where it went. I was in such a daze when the month began and was still basking in the glow of the last Fat Figs show. I guess I let those first few weeks just sort of go by (or bye-bye, as the case truly is).
I can’t believe we are on the cusp of the final month of 2023. December Eve, if you will. Where did you go, November? What did you do?
If I was a smart person, I would go back and just read my daily account of my life so I could remember what November was really like, but instead, I’m looking forward. Not necessarily to December, but life in general.
Yesterday, I spent some a little quality time with Granny. I was planning on taking L & T with me after I picked them up from school, but they opted to spend a little time with their Oma. Now, Oma is not really their grandmother, but she has become one to them over the years. It’s a beautiful thing, too.
Oma (aka Ina) is Rhondi’s ex-mother-in-law. She’s a very special lady to our kids and to Rhondi and I have developed a fondness for her, too. Sadly, she’s very near death. A serious heart condition has taken a turn for the worse and, according to the hospice nurse, she’s not going to be with us for much longer.
My heart hurts for all who love her right now. They came to our house for Thanksgiving, and it was really lovely. Even though they are not my in-laws, they have always been very kind to me. Oma and I got to have a nice moment or two on Thanksgiving and I knew it would probably be the last time I would get to see her.
In my heart, I am good with it. I could have gone to see her last night, too, with everyone else, but I opted to stay home. I just felt like the closure I needed with her happened last Thursday night. I won’t have any regrets, but I certainly don’t want anyone else to have them. My heart was with them all last night as I know it was difficult.
Death is so weird. The older I get, my attitude about it changes all the time. It’s been on my mind a lot as I’ve been spending a lot of time with Granny as of late and I feel that her time is short, too. I have thought a lot about how I will feel when I get that particular call and it won’t be pretty.
I’ve also thought about my own mortality, too. I’m not going to live forever and I’m okay with it. We all should be. Like Jim Morrison sang, “No one here gets out alive.”
More than anything, when it is my time, I want the people I love to know that I loved them and will always love them. I don’t believe that love can ever disappear. It is an energy. I will disappear. My thoughts and feelings will be gone, except for those I have shared via words and songs and recordings, but the love I feel for my friends and family will always exist.
That can’t be changed.
Just as I hope my friends and family will find peace when I make my transition to whatever comes next, I hope that those who are hurting all over because they are missing someone they love right now can find peace, too.
See you tomorrow.
Ten years ago. We are handsome.
Comments